Benny Bigggs: Asian Invasion ‘06

Even the best invasions don’t always go smoothly and regina and I finally had that day where everything goes wrong. We were suppose to climb fuji on thursday night and the information online said the 3 busses left at 7:50, 8:50 and 9:50. So we went supply shopping for some gear so we wouldn’t die on the mountain and went to the station for the 7:50 bus. Since no one speaks english it took us till about 8:30 till we found the right station and everything where they promptly let us know that the info online was wrong because the last bus to fuji left at 8:10. I think Regina was secretly glad we missed it because it later started downpouring.

Afterwards we tried to find solace in the only thing that could make the day any better…beer. We went back to our new hostel (which kicked ass) and drank with the people staying there. About 2am one of the English guys there tells us about a karaoke bar he knows about and how he knows the bartender there and he’ll hook us up with free karaoke if we buy drinks. So we went there and we had some strong as sake (is that how you spell it ryna??) and did some karaoke that would have made even Chippy Chippy Yum Yum proud. If you’ve never heard her I would recommend catching Regina in concert just make sure you bring ear plugs So after a few pavarotti-esque songs regina sat down at the bar and all of the sudden couldn’t stop hiccuping. She tried to get the bartenders attention but he was playing on the internet so she asked me to get the pourer from behind the bar so she could have water. So as I’m grabbing it the English guy all of the sudden starts going nuts and saying we were trying to steal alcohol and this is how we repay him back and blah blah blah. Maybe this guy never heard of the bikergang?? The bartender obvious didn’t care and we smoothed things over with him but the English prick couldn’t get it straight that we weren’t stealing so we bounced.

After we found our way back to the hostel in the pouring rain we noticed the hostel door was locked. The guy at the front desk gave me the pin number to get back in when we checked in but I left it in the room. Luckily there was an overhead and a couch under it so we could passed out on that. You might be surprised to learn this was not the first time Benny Bigggs “slept” outside.

We finished up Japan by shopping in Shibuya and checking out the Love Hotels where you can buy used underwear in the vending machine (I’ll bring some back for Charles).

Well thats all for now I’ll be back on when I can to report about our time in Korea and Benny Bigggs first experience with the juicy girls…

B

 

(Beware a toilet story is ahead and may not be suitable for small children…)

Technology and Tokyo have always seemed to go hand and hand as Reginia and I discovered today. We visited the Electronic District today which is a market that hosts a least 100 different vendors with everything from computer parts, dubbed 80’s (I swear there was an Emilio section) to next years cell phones.

But did you know that the Japanese are also on the forefront of toilet technology as well?? The tea ceremony we went to today (probably the coolest thing we’ve done so far) was housed in a very expensive hotel. After using the facilities Reginia told me the toilets in the bathroom had a control panel on it with tons of buttons and 1 of them warmed the seats. Sounding to good to be true I decided to check it out. It turns these controls only work if you actually sit down on the toilet and being the adventurous traveler I am, I obliged. After playing with the console for a bit I decide to press the button labeled “spray” and the next thing I know there was a humming sound and some vibrating thing was going near my bum which prompted me to jump off my seat and into the stall door. The next thing I know I am getting hosed down by an electronic biday. Lesson learned….

It FINALLY stopped raining today and Reginia said if it doesn’t rain tomorrow she’s going to climb fuji so keep your fingers crossed (for whichever way you voted)

And finally…We’ve been posting a lot lately but we are leaving this hostel tomorrow so I don’t know how much internet access we’ll have to post in the next 5 days (2 left in tokyo and 3 in a hotel in Korea). I’ll try to post one more time before we leave, especially if we climb fuji. Well we’re off to the bars….
B

Here are some pics for now…many more to come…. 

Ronald lends a helping hand to the invasion

The moat around the Imperial Palace

Every good invasion needs a Colonel!!

One of the beautiful gardens in Tokyo

Tokyo’s Imperial Palace

Ancient Japanese customs make hostels smell like feet

B&E is breaking and entering for all you civilians out there and it:s a good thing benny bigggs has a long history of it. While I was drunk blogging last nite the lovely reginia decided to lock us out of our dorm room (I suppose bubba can put a poll up to decide who was more drunk last nite). Luckily I took a B&E class at south philly high and was able to use a credit card to break us back in since our only other option was sleep on the feet smelling floor or disgusting common couch.

 As far as the Fuji update, all your comments are helping. I think I:ve almost convinced reginia to climb it with me. Since I hear i:m getting 2-1 odds put me down for 1000 fazuls to climb the mountain. I:d bet cash but this trip is costing me all my cash so i:m gonna have to bet in WIP currency

So I bet you:re all wondering about tokyo…well its not nearly as crowded as we expected and virtually no one speaks english. We order our meals mostly through the language of pointing and luckily the Japanese have inifinite amounts of patience and are the nicest people I:ve ever met. You can also find beer in any vending machine on almost any corner, porn in any corner store and dayum this town loves to gamble. Even the arcades are 95% gambling games so they start off their kids off right.

Basically Tokyo didn:t need much of an invasion it was already a benny biggg:s mecca. And as far as the invasion is going people still bow to us wherever we go and we:ve enlisted the help of a few friends to spread news of the invasion (the pics should be posted today).

 And finally for the people that actually want to hear the nice things we:re are seeing, I:m posting some pictures of the places we:ve been. The gardens around tokyo are amazing and the imperial palace was definitely worth seeing. Reginia and I have also taken part in some Buddist prayer ceremonies. I:ve finally tried sushi and we got a 360 night-time view of Tokyo in the Mori tower that put all other city views i:ve seen to shame ..next up the electronic district, taking part in a tea ceremony and some R&R at the public bath houses

B

 warning drunk post ahead… 

More about our first couple of days in Japan later….I wanted to get some votes on a debate that is raging in the anex hostel right now….to climb mt fugi or not to climb fugi?? We just spent the last 3 hours in a bar listening to 2 people with completely differnet opinions on the matter. In one corner we got a spanish guy saying it was his favorite part of the trip and in the other corner we got a group of irish/english guys that went today that said it was by far thew worst day of their lives because they got pneumonia and it was 12 hours and the wind almost blew them off the cliff and blah blah blah. Apparently we are in the last week of rainy season and the typhones are starting up. They complained it was 11 hours in the freezing rain and they couldn:t see anything because of the clouds.

Maybe it:s all the sokee in me tight now but I still want to climb it so send your comments to convince Regina to go up there with me or send your comments to mee saying i:m a retard and shouldn:t climb the mountain even though they are predicting rain for the next 5 days with 100% certainty.

 ….And just in case you:re wondering the Japanese are accepting the invasion better than expected, they bow to benny bigggs everywhere we go woo woo

I just wanted to check in for a second and let everyone know we landed safely in Tokyo. The flight was loooong (13 hours) and the movie choices sucked. The only movie I watched was Take the Lead that starred antonio banderas teaching misfit 10 kids from the ghetto how to ballroom dance while they were in detention…the script wrote itself.

 Anyway we haven:t seen much of Tokyo yet but the hostel and an area called Asakusa which is where our hostel resides in. We have to take our shoes off before we enter the hostel so the front smells like feet which is perfect cause the bathroom smells like ass. We have bunkbeds (benny bigggs is always on top) and our room is about the size of a closet. All in all I missed hostel living

 Today the invasion offically begins our sites set on Tokyo. It:s suppose to rain everyday we are here but even the elements won:t stop the invasion although it will make climbing mt fugi interesting. I:ll report all on tokyo soon and leave some love

BB